Red Fingernails

You know, there are a few things I just can't seem to make myself like. I have always hated white shoes, even after Labor Day I still can't make myself wear white dress shoes. I think I saw some weird lady wearing black hose with white shoes and it ruined it for me. I would never wear white shoes with black hose but I can't help but hate white shoes now.


Nude hose, now that's another. It has taken me forever to like nude hose. I don't know why but they have always been tacky to me. I still don't like 'e'm but I wear them now out of necessity. Ya gotta do what ya gotta do sometimes, whether I like it or not.  


Really high pony tails are another one of my fashion hates. Even in school when they were cool I still didn't like them. They reminded me too much of a valley girl or some silly girl like that. I loved all the other fashions from the 80s but those high ponytails just ain't for me. 


I know that what we see and experience as kids and the sorta folks that sport those styles really make an impression, whether positive or negative. I remember a lady that I knew that wore rings on both hands. While there isn't a thing in the world wrong or ugly about rings on multiple fingers my mind can't get past that lady.  I have been influenced by people I have known. Hey there are even names that I can't stand, names that evoke a feeling or thought. I'm not even gonna give my list of names in fear of hurting someones feelings that might share one of those names but it's true I do have negative feelings about some names.


Anyhow one of my real hates has always been red fingernails. I don't know why but I have always associated red nails with wild women. (disclaimer: I know that there isn't a thing wrong with red nails. I know that they are not a sign of risky women or of uncomely ladies just wanted you to know that) for some reason as a young girl I formed the opinion that red nails were a bit risky and I have never been able to wear them...Until now!


My husband recently expressed a like of red nails. He has never been vocal about about the way I dress or anything like that. The other day we were sitting having a coffee and I asked him what he thought about my grayish light purple nail polish. He replied that it was nice, reminded him or Easter and then stated that he prefers red. I was taken back a bit. Red nails?? Are you joking with me? No, he was serious. He thinks they're pretty. 
Wow, red nails are pretty? They're pretty and not risky? 


Whoa now, he likes something I hate? How am I gonna reconcile this? I can't wear red nail polish! I can't! I don't wanna be perceived like that. No I wont!!! I won't wear red nail polish! Never!


Uh oh, I thought to my self. I wont because I don't like it? Does it matter what he likes? Can I really live with red nails? I questioned my idiosyncrasies and realized that his desires are my privilege. Really, who was I trying to please? Me, others? Wow, I realized something, his opinion is so much more important than mine. I don't buy into all this women's lib junk: "I need to love myself and I'm number one." I know that self esteem is  important in a marriage but much more important is living for each other. When I live for him I'm happy. I am secure in who I am with him. I am not Tori alone, no, we are Johnny and Tori together. I have self esteem and worth with him. 

Red nails... yes red nails and the adoration of a husband that knows my desire is only unto him and his wants are my desire. So as I type this I'm watching my red nails skate across my keyboard and smiling a little to myself. It feels nice to know I have sacrificed something I like or dislike for what he wants. Red fingernails??? Yea...He's worth it!